1
00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:27,520


2
00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:29,560


3
00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:30,000


4
00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:32,040


5
00:00:32,080 --> 00:00:34,040

To fall in love

6
00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:35,560

To fall in love

7
00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:37,600


8
00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:37,840
<font color="

9
00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:39,840


10
00:00:39,880 --> 00:00:41,880

To fall in love...

11
00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:43,920

To fall in love...

12
00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:44,960

To fall in love...

13
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,000
WHISTLING

14
00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:47,200
WHISTLING

15
00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:49,200
<font color="

16
00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:52,040
IN SPANISH:

17
00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:54,080

Please

18
00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:54,840

Please

19
00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:56,840

Just one minute

20
00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:58,880

Just one minute

21
00:00:58,920 --> 00:00:59,200

<font color="

22
00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:01,240

It only takes a minute, girl

23
00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:02,760

It only takes a minute, girl

24
00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:04,520

To fall in love

25
00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:06,520

To fall in love

26
00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:08,560
<font color="

27
00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:08,840


28
00:01:08,880 --> 00:01:10,880
Hi, hi!
GROUP: Oi!

29
00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:11,320
Hi, hi!
GROUP: Oi!

30
00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:13,360


31
00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:13,920


32
00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:15,960
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

33
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:16,160
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

34
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,000
It's still early season.
So, why's everyone else selling out?

35
00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:36,280
<font color="
So, why's everyone else selling out?

36
00:01:36,320 --> 00:01:38,080
Last Tuesday at Waikiki's,

37
00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:40,120
they were queueing round the block
for Jeff Leppard.

38
00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:40,400
they were queueing round the block
for Jeff Leppard.

39
00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:41,360
I'm done, mate.

40
00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:45,680
STEVE SIGHS
What's going on?

41
00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:45,960
STEVE SIGHS
What's going on?

42
00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:46,920
Darren's leaving the band.

43
00:01:46,960 --> 00:01:48,200
Oh, bloody hell!

44
00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:50,240
Benidorm's Best Tribute Act 2019,
and you're just walking away?

45
00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:52,280
Benidorm's Best Tribute Act 2019,
and you're just walking away?

46
00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,000
Benidorm's Best Tribute Act 2019,
and you're just walking away?

47
00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:55,040
<font color="
Oh, well, of course, you don't care.

48
00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:56,600
Mate, if he wants to go, just...
Oh, well, of course, you don't care.

49
00:01:56,640 --> 00:01:58,640
You've always thought
you'd make a better Robbie.

50
00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:00,680
What?!
Well, you have, though, haven't you?

51
00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:00,920
<font color="
Well, you have, though, haven't you?

52
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:03,920
Yeah.
Well, it's all yours, mate,

53
00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:04,240
Yeah.
Well, it's all yours, mate,

54
00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:05,840
cos I'm gonna do
my own Robbie Williams night.

55
00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:07,480
In Benidorm?
No.

56
00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:09,520
<font color="
at Caesars Carvery in Faliraki,

57
00:02:09,560 --> 00:02:09,880
I've got a gig
at Caesars Carvery in Faliraki,

58
00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:11,720
and I'm leaving tomorrow.

59
00:02:11,760 --> 00:02:13,760
If you're going, I'm gonna need
that grand you owe me.

60
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:14,080
If you're going, I'm gonna need
that grand you owe me.

61
00:02:14,120 --> 00:02:16,120
Oh, give it up, mate.
You're never seeing that again.

62
00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:17,000
<font color="
You're never seeing that again.

63
00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:19,040
Dicks like Darren
are only out for themselves.

64
00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:19,960
Dicks like Darren
are only out for themselves.

65
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,680
You know
he's been shagging Isabella.

66
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,000
Oh...

67
00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:25,880
You what?

68
00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:27,480
<font color="

69
00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:29,520
cos I guess now it's time
that you are sacked for good.

70
00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:30,880
cos I guess now it's time
that you are sacked for good.

71
00:02:30,920 --> 00:02:32,240
I'm sacking you. You're sacked.

72
00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:34,280
We only got that award cos I started
singing Angels in the encore.

73
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,320
<font color="
singing Angels in the encore.

74
00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:36,800
We only got that award cos I started
singing Angels in the encore.

75
00:02:36,840 --> 00:02:38,360
In fact, that is mine.

76
00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:39,960
You touch that award,
and I'll kill you!

77
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,000
Shh, shh! What's going on?

78
00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:42,200
<font color="

79
00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,960
Boys... Boys,
enough with the argy-bargy.

80
00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:46,720
Boys... Boys,
enough with the argy-bargy.

81
00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:48,760
I'm doing you a favour, lads, cos
you're wasting your life out here.

82
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:50,520
I'm doing you a favour, lads, cos
<font color="

83
00:02:50,560 --> 00:02:52,560
Go home, do something else
before you wake up in ten years

84
00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,600
Go home, do something else
before you wake up in ten years

85
00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:55,120
Go home, do something else
before you wake up in ten years

86
00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:57,160
and realise
<font color="

87
00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:57,560
and realise
what's obvious to everyone else -

88
00:02:57,600 --> 00:02:59,600
you're just three knobheads
from Yorkshire who can't sing.

89
00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:01,280
you're just three knobheads
from Yorkshire who can't sing.

90
00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:06,440
I'm actually from Runcorn.

91
00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:08,120
WHISPERING:Oh, my God.

92
00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:13,080
SIGHS

93
00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:29,600
<font color="

94
00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:29,880
Darren, it's me. Open up.

95
00:03:29,920 --> 00:03:31,920
Darren, I want that award back.
I'm not leaving without it.

96
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:33,440
Darren, I want that award back.
I'm not leaving without it.

97
00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:35,360
You know I've got a key, dickhead.

98
00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:28,880
Shell?

99
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:42,200
What we gonna do?

100
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:46,320
Suppose we'll have to go
to the beach.<font color="

101
00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:46,560
Suppose we'll have to go
to the beach.Oh!

102
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:43,800
Morning, Dennis.

103
00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:47,240
Archie... What you doing there?

104
00:06:47,280 --> 00:06:49,160
You didn't kick me out last night.

105
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,200
You weren't in here last night.
I checked.

106
00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:51,480
You weren't in here last night.
I checked.

107
00:06:51,520 --> 00:06:52,480
Not under the table.

108
00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:54,520
SIGHS

109
00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:54,720
SIGHS

110
00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:12,600
DOOR OPENS

111
00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:17,600
You need help.

112
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:23,640
Ah. You worked in a pub before?

113
00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:24,040
Ah. You worked in a pub before?

114
00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:26,080
Have I?! I grew up in a pub.

115
00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:27,080
Have I?! I grew up in a pub.

116
00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:29,120
I've been pouring pints
since I was three years old.

117
00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:29,360
I've been pouring pints
since I was three years old.

118
00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:32,360
Obviously, that was a lie.

119
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:34,400
Ten euros an hour, cash in hand.

120
00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:34,680
Ten euros an hour, cash in hand.

121
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,720
Ten? No, no, no. Let's negotiate.
OK, seven.

122
00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:37,720
Ten? No, no, no. Let's negotiate.
OK, seven.

123
00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:39,760
I am a fast learner
with a diploma... in acting.

124
00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:41,800
I am a fast learner
with a diploma... in acting.

125
00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:42,120
I am a fast learner
<font color="

126
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:43,840
Also a proven liar
with no experience.

127
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:45,440
Let's say 12.
Nine.

128
00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:46,800
Eleven?
Ten.

129
00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:48,840
Perfect! But I need time off
for auditions.

130
00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:49,120
Perfect! But I need time off
for auditions.

131
00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:49,960
Deal.

132
00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:05,760
So, anyway, I'm waiting there.

133
00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:07,800
<font color="
wanting to talk to me.

134
00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:09,840
There's a queue of beautiful women
wanting to talk to me.

135
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:10,400
There's a queue of beautiful women
wanting to talk to me.

136
00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:12,440
Archie, I'm not coming
to some over-50s singles night.

137
00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:13,560
Archie, I'm not coming
to some over-50s singles night.

138
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:15,600
<font color="
until you've seen the photos.

139
00:08:15,640 --> 00:08:17,640
Ah, nah, reserve judgment
until you've seen the photos.

140
00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:18,000
Ah, nah, reserve judgment
until you've seen the photos.

141
00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:22,400
Sorry, first day. What was it?

142
00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:24,440
A coke.
<font color="

143
00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:25,640
A coke.
A coke. I can do that.

144
00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:30,200
Er, excuse me, is your kitchen open?

145
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:31,320
Er, excuse me, is your kitchen open?

146
00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:33,160
Kitchen?

147
00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:35,200
Erm, I'm not sure. Dennis?

148
00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:36,000
Erm, I'm not sure. Dennis?

149
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:38,760
Is the kitchen open?

150
00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:44,280
Yep.
<font color="

151
00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:44,800
Yep.
Yes.

152
00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:46,400
HE SIGHS IN RELIEF

153
00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:47,920
Here.

154
00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:52,520
Margarita was Miss Costa Rica 1996.

155
00:08:52,560 --> 00:08:54,240
Margarita was Miss Costa Rica 1996.

156
00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:57,360
I'm done with relationships, mate.

157
00:08:57,400 --> 00:08:59,280
Who said anything
about relationships?

158
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:02,160
Everyone's only there
for one thing -

159
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:04,200
<font color="
beneficial physical intimacy.

160
00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:06,240
couple of hours of mutually
beneficial physical intimacy.

161
00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:07,040
couple of hours of mutually
beneficial physical intimacy.

162
00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:11,320
Longer for me... cos I'm tantric.

163
00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:11,960
Longer for me... cos I'm tantric.

164
00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:15,840
SIGHS

165
00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:24,360
<font color="
SHE CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY

166
00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:28,160
You look familiar.
Did you work at the Vegas Lounge?

167
00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:28,600
You look familiar.
Did you work at the Vegas Lounge?

168
00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:30,640
Yeah, I play piano for Non-Jovi.

169
00:09:30,680 --> 00:09:32,440
Yeah, I play piano for Non-Jovi.

170
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:34,480
Rita?
<font color="

171
00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:35,200
Rita?
Rosa. I was a dancer.

172
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:36,720
You remember the sexy horses?

173
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:38,760
Didn't recognise you
without your stirrups.

174
00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:39,000
Didn't recognise you
without your stirrups.

175
00:09:40,840 --> 00:09:42,840
How are you? You don't look great.

176
00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:43,080
<font color="

177
00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:44,720
Me and a mate had a falling-out.

178
00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:48,640
But you don't want me to bore you
with my problems.

179
00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:49,160
But you don't want me to bore you
with my problems.

180
00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,240
OK.

181
00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:53,280
He always thought
he was the talented one.

182
00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:54,600
<font color="
he was the talented one.

183
00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:55,720
Maybe he was.

184
00:09:56,840 --> 00:09:58,480
Maybe I was jealous.

185
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:01,680
But this morning, they found
his body floating in the pool.

186
00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:02,680
But this morning, they found
his body floating in the pool.

187
00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:04,320
Holy shit!

188
00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:07,840
<font color="

189
00:10:07,880 --> 00:10:08,280
Sorry. What happened?

190
00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:10,200
Well, I don't know.

191
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:11,960
There must've been
some kind of accident.

192
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,720
Steven Evans?

193
00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:17,080
I'm arresting you
for the murder of Darren Small.

194
00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:17,320
I'm arresting you
for the murder of Darren Small.

195
00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,760
What?
Holy shit.

196
00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:22,040
What?
<font color="

197
00:10:43,440 --> 00:10:45,440
I swear, the last time I saw him
was backstage after the gig.

198
00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:47,200
I swear, the last time I saw him
was backstage after the gig.

199
00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:49,080
Yeah, where we know
you had a big fight.

200
00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:51,120
CCTV shows you go into his room
last night at 1:46am.

201
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:53,160
CCTV shows you go into his room
last night at 1:46am.

202
00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:53,560
<font color="
last night at 1:46am.

203
00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:55,600
I was drunk.
I just went to get something.

204
00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:56,560
I was drunk.
I just went to get something.

205
00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:58,600
What?
This award.

206
00:10:58,640 --> 00:10:59,080
What?
This award.

207
00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,120
It's a stupid lump of glass,
but it weren't in his room,

208
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:01,400
It's a stupid lump of glass,
but it weren't in his room,

209
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:03,440
and neither was Darren, I swear.

210
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:03,720
and neither was Darren, I swear.

211
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,760
I was in there
no longer than a minute.

212
00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:06,080
I was in there
no longer than a minute.

213
00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:08,120
Long enough to throw someone
off a balcony.

214
00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:08,400
Long enough to throw someone
off a balcony.

215
00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:10,280
Yeah, it only takes a minute.

216
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,600
What? Why was that weird?

217
00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:15,880
What? Why was that weird?

218
00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,440
<font color="
Ah.

219
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:23,640
This is wrong. I know him.
He's actually really nice.

220
00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:24,160
This is wrong. I know him.
He's actually really nice.

221
00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:25,800
It's OK, lady.
We know what we're doing.

222
00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:27,560
HE SCOFFS

223
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:29,600
You can go back inside now, Dennis.
Is it "bring your kid to work" day?

224
00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:30,960
<font color="
Is it "bring your kid to work" day?

225
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,000
I'm 23.
Got any ID?

226
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:34,280
I'm 23.
Got any ID?

227
00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:40,200
Jesus Ballesteros.
You know her?

228
00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:41,440
Jesus Ballesteros.
You know her?

229
00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:43,480
Inspector Hernandez and I have a
long-running difference of opinion.

230
00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:45,040
Inspector Hernandez and I have a
long-running difference of opinion.

231
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,080
She thinks
my alcohol license is dodgy.

232
00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:47,400
She thinks
my alcohol license is dodgy.

233
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,400
I think she's a complete waste
of tax payers' money.

234
00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:51,440
Ha! As if you pay tax.

235
00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:51,640
Ha! As if you pay tax.

236
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:56,920
We may need to take a statement.

237
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:58,960
Let me give you my personal number.
Jesus!

238
00:11:59,000 --> 00:11:59,240
<font color="
Jesus!

239
00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:04,240
HE CHUCKLES SOFTLY

240
00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:23,720
Is Craig With The Monkey
a real person?

241
00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:24,000
Is Craig With The Monkey
a real person?

242
00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:26,040
Yes and no.

243
00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:26,320
Yes and no.

244
00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:28,360
Not his real name?
Not a real monkey.

245
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:28,640
Not his real name?
Not a real monkey.

246
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:37,920
<font color="

247
00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:39,960
HE SIGHS
35 years.

248
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:40,200
HE SIGHS
35 years.

249
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:43,360
So you should come to the hotel
where the man died and investigate.

250
00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:44,120
So you should come to the hotel
where the man died and investigate.

251
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,160
SCOFFS

252
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:46,400
SCOFFS

253
00:12:46,440 --> 00:12:48,000
And why would I wanna do that?

254
00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,040
Moral obligation.

255
00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:50,320
Moral obligation.

256
00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:52,360
<font color="
an innocent man will go to jail.

257
00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:52,720
If we do nothing,
an innocent man will go to jail.

258
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:54,760
How can you be sure he's innocent?

259
00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:55,000
How can you be sure he's innocent?

260
00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:56,840
I have a gift.

261
00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:58,880
I know when people are telling
the truth.

262
00:12:58,920 --> 00:12:59,160
<font color="
the truth.

263
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:00,040
OK.

264
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:02,560
I don't wanna investigate

265
00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:04,600
because I can't be bothered
and I don't care.

266
00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:04,920
because I can't be bothered
and I don't care.

267
00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,080
Was that true?

268
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:10,800
Hm.

269
00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:17,240
That detective woman,
you don't like her, right?

270
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:18,440
That detective woman,
you don't like her, right?

271
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,800
Not really.
<font color="

272
00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:23,440
Not really.
So prove she's got the wrong man.

273
00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:25,480
Make her look really dumb.
Hello?

274
00:13:25,520 --> 00:13:26,920
Make her look really dumb.
Hello?

275
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:28,760
Serve that fella, would you?

276
00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:36,800
What the hell you doing?

277
00:13:36,840 --> 00:13:38,840
One hour,
or I will throw this in the sea.

278
00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:39,400
<font color="
or I will throw this in the sea.

279
00:13:39,440 --> 00:13:41,080
You throw that in the sea,
I'll sack you.

280
00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:43,120
You don't help,
I quit AND throw this in the sea.

281
00:13:43,160 --> 00:13:43,760
You don't help,
I quit AND throw this in the sea.

282
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:49,880
SIGHS DEEPLY

283
00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,520
Half an hour.
Great! Come on.

284
00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:54,200
Half an hour.
<font color="

285
00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:56,480
What, you're coming, too?

286
00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,280
What do you know
about investigating murders?

287
00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:01,960
Everything!

288
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,480
When I was 12, I broke my leg,

289
00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:05,240
so my parents bought me
a DVD player.

290
00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:07,280
You know one of those little
portable ones with the screen?

291
00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:07,720
<font color="
portable ones with the screen?

292
00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:09,760
They bought it second-hand
from some old English woman.

293
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:10,520
They bought it second-hand
from some old English woman.

294
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:11,680
I think she died.

295
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,720
Anyway, when I tried to use it,
<font color="

296
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:14,520
Anyway, when I tried to use it,
I saw there was a disc inside,

297
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:16,560
and that disc was the first-ever
episode of Midsomer Murders.

298
00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:18,440
and that disc was the first-ever
episode of Midsomer Murders.

299
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:19,680
Do you know that show?

300
00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:21,720
<font color="
"This is SO old-fashioned,"

301
00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:22,480
I played it, and I was thinking,
"This is SO old-fashioned,"

302
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:23,720
and I was going to turn it off,

303
00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:25,760
but then Gerald Hadleigh
is found beaten to death,

304
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:26,240
but then Gerald Hadleigh
<font color="

305
00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:28,280
and I'm like,
"I have to know who did this."

306
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:28,640
and I'm like,
"I have to know who did this."

307
00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:30,240
By the time my cast came off,

308
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:32,280
I had already watched
all 142 episodes.

309
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:33,600
I had already watched
<font color="

310
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:36,920
And after that, I took a super-deep
dive into Murder, She Wrote,

311
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:37,880
And after that, I took a super-deep
dive into Murder, She Wrote,

312
00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:39,920
Diagnosis Murder,
Touch Of Frost, Bergerac...

313
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:40,640
Diagnosis Murder,
<font color="

314
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,680
This is not like on telly.

315
00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:43,000
This is not like on telly.

316
00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,040
Real police work takes hundreds
of hours of gathering information.

317
00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:46,440
Real police work takes hundreds
of hours of gathering information.

318
00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:48,280
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're the boss!

319
00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:50,320
I am only here to observe.

320
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:50,600
I am only here to observe.

321
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:52,640
Look, I'll go on my own
and ask some questions in the bar.

322
00:14:52,680 --> 00:14:53,280
Look, I'll go on my own
and ask some questions in the bar.

323
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,320
You stay here
and don't talk to anyone, OK?

324
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:56,680
You stay here
and don't talk to anyone, OK?

325
00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:58,720
Stay here, don't talk to anyone,
million percent.

326
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:00,040
Stay here, don't talk to anyone,
million percent.

327
00:15:10,320 --> 00:15:12,320
Excuse me,
<font color="

328
00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:12,840
Excuse me,
can I ask you a few questions?

329
00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:22,360
OK, this is big. I've got something.

330
00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:22,800
OK, this is big. I've got something.

331
00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:26,480
This is Shell and Tony.
Call me Big Tone.

332
00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:27,320
This is Shell and Tony.
<font color="

333
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,360
No.
Tony and Shell arrived last night.

334
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,600
No.
Tony and Shell arrived last night.

335
00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:32,640
Tell him what you told me.
Well, we were delayed getting in.

336
00:15:32,680 --> 00:15:33,920
Tell him what you told me.
Well, we were delayed getting in.

337
00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,800
Three hours on the tarmac
<font color="

338
00:15:35,840 --> 00:15:37,840
When we got to reception,
there was no-one there.

339
00:15:37,880 --> 00:15:38,240
When we got to reception,
there was no-one there.

340
00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:40,280
'Then all of a sudden...'
WATER SPLASHES

341
00:15:40,320 --> 00:15:41,560
'Then all of a sudden...'
WATER SPLASHES

342
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:43,600
What was that splash?
<font color="

343
00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:43,960
What was that splash?
It was probably a seagull.

344
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,000
A seagull?
Yeah, one of them big ones.

345
00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:47,600
A seagull?
Yeah, one of them big ones.

346
00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:49,640
A seagull?
Yeah. One of them big ones.

347
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:50,440
A seagull?
<font color="

348
00:15:50,480 --> 00:15:52,480
I said,
"What's a seagull doing in the pool?

349
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:53,080
I said,
"What's a seagull doing in the pool?

350
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,560
"Should be in the sea."
SHE CHUCKLES

351
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:56,520
And now I'm thinking
it's more likely that bloke.

352
00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:58,520
<font color="

353
00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:00,560
Quarter to one.
I'd just checked my watch.

354
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:01,040
Quarter to one.
I'd just checked my watch.

355
00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:04,360
The police said Steve went
into Darren's room at 1:46,

356
00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:05,200
The police said Steve went
into Darren's room at 1:46,

357
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:06,400
<font color="

358
00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:07,960
Darren was already dead.

359
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:11,360
OK, not bad.

360
00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:13,680
Thank you.

361
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:18,440
The killer is still out there.
We can solve this case.

362
00:16:18,480 --> 00:16:19,520
The killer is still out there.
We can solve this case.

363
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:21,560
If you were still in the police,
<font color="

364
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:22,520
If you were still in the police,
what would you do now?

365
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:24,560
We'd go to the pub.
After the pub.

366
00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:25,120
We'd go to the pub.
After the pub.

367
00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,160
Probably a curry.
In the investigation.

368
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:27,960
Probably a curry.
In the investigation.

369
00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:31,120
Er, probably question the band.

370
00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:31,960
Er, probably question the band.

371
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,720
Yes! Let's do that.

372
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:38,320
SIGHS

373
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:46,920
Say that again.

374
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:48,960
I'm Jason,
but in the band, I play Mark.

375
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:50,400
I'm Jason,
but in the band, I play Mark.

376
00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:52,440
He's Mark,
but in the band, he plays Jason.

377
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:52,840
He's Mark,
<font color="

378
00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:54,440
Ah.

379
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:56,480
And Howard.
Joward.

380
00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:56,800
And Howard.
Joward.

381
00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:58,840
People could never tell the
difference between Howard and Jason,

382
00:16:58,880 --> 00:16:59,440
People could never tell the
difference between Howard and Jason,

383
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:01,480
<font color="

384
00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:01,920
so we just combined the two.

385
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:03,040
Saves money.

386
00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:06,360
So, what did you guys do
after the gig last night?

387
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,400
I was with Isabella.
She's my girlfriend.

388
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:08,680
I was with Isabella.
She's my girlfriend.

389
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:09,840
Ex-girlfriend.

390
00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,800
<font color="
I was in my room all night.

391
00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:15,240
And you?
I was in my room all night.

392
00:17:17,760 --> 00:17:19,240
And what was Darren like?

393
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:27,600
Well, he was, er... a good singer.

394
00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:29,040
Well, he was, er... a good singer.

395
00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:31,080
And he knew it. He was arrogant.

396
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,120
And tight. He never got a round in.
<font color="

397
00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:33,720
And tight. He never got a round in.
Still owes me a grand.

398
00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,760
Yeah, you couldn't trust him.
He stole his bird.

399
00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:36,400
Yeah, you couldn't trust him.
He stole his bird.

400
00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:40,680
Still, he was a good singer, though?

401
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:41,120
Still, he was a good singer, though?

402
00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:45,760
CARLOS:<font color="

403
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,240
And, er, who are you?

404
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:50,280
I'm Sergeant Rosa Ortega.

405
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,040
I'm Sergeant Rosa Ortega.

406
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:53,080
Inspector... Dennis.
You all right?

407
00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:53,800
Inspector... Dennis.
You all right?

408
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:55,840
Inspector Dennis has just flown in

409
00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:56,240
Inspector Dennis has just flown in

410
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:58,280
<font color="
to assist with our investigation.

411
00:17:58,320 --> 00:17:58,560
from the UK
to assist with our investigation.

412
00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,600
Did the airline lose your bags?

413
00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:00,880
Did the airline lose your bags?

414
00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:01,920
No.
Yes.

415
00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:05,840
Ah... Yeah.

416
00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:06,040
Ah... Yeah.

417
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:09,880
Please be discrete
<font color="

418
00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:11,280
Please be discrete
with your inquiries.

419
00:18:11,320 --> 00:18:13,320
I like everything to be perfect,
perfect, perfect for our guests.

420
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:15,360
I like everything to be perfect,
perfect, perfect for our guests.

421
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:17,200
I like everything to be perfect,
<font color="

422
00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:18,600
This your place, is it, Carlos?

423
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,640
Yes, my wife and I took over
eight years ago.

424
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:22,680
Yes, my wife and I took over
eight years ago.

425
00:18:22,720 --> 00:18:22,920
Yes, my wife and I took over
eight years ago.

426
00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:25,960
She's young enough
to be his daughter.

427
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:26,560
She's young enough
to be his daughter.

428
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:28,400
<font color="

429
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:31,920
My wife died two years ago.

430
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:33,960
Ah, sorry for your loss.

431
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:34,240
Ah, sorry for your loss.

432
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,280
She's like my Puig Campana,
you know?

433
00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:37,080
She's like my Puig Campana,
you know?

434
00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:39,120
The mountain
that looks over Benidorm.

435
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:39,520
<font color="
that looks over Benidorm.

436
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:41,720
She's my rock.

437
00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:44,600
If you'll excuse me.

438
00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:46,640
Isabella, see that the detectives
have everything they need.

439
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:47,440
Isabella, see that the detectives
have everything they need.

440
00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,240
How can I help you?

441
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,280
Ah, it's all right.
We were just leaving.

442
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:54,280
We need a copy of the CCTV
from last night

443
00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:56,000
and a key to the crime scene.

444
00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:58,280
Sure.

445
00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:07,120
So sad to think this is the last
thing someone saw before they died.

446
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:08,800
So sad to think this is the last
<font color="

447
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:12,000
So, what are we looking for?
CAMERA CLICKS

448
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:13,720
So, what are we looking for?
CAMERA CLICKS

449
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:15,600
I'll know when I find it.

450
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:17,640
Of course, the anomaly.

451
00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:19,680
The little thing in the room
that only the detective notices.

452
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:21,640
The little thing in the room
<font color="

453
00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:23,680
The missing chess piece,
the two left shoes.

454
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:24,360
The missing chess piece,
the two left shoes.

455
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:27,920
In Murder, She Wrote,
series five, episode 13,

456
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:28,240
In Murder, She Wrote,
series five, episode 13,

457
00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:30,200
<font color="

458
00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:32,240
Everyone thinks, "Whatever,"
but Jessica knows it's important.

459
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:34,280
Everyone thinks, "Whatever,"
but Jessica knows it's important.

460
00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:34,640
Everyone thinks, "Whatever,"
but Jessica knows it's important.

461
00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:36,600
In the end,
<font color="

462
00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:37,920
to clean the crime scene.

463
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:39,640
There you go - the anomaly.

464
00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:41,680
TRAFFIC DRONES

465
00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:42,080
TRAFFIC DRONES

466
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:46,760
Dennis, come out here.

467
00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:53,440
Do you think
someone can climb around that?

468
00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:58,760
HE SCOFFS
Yeah, Spider-Man.

469
00:19:58,800 --> 00:19:59,000
HE SCOFFS
Yeah, Spider-Man.

470
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:02,360
You know, I can't decide
<font color="

471
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:02,720
You know, I can't decide
if you're more like Morse,

472
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:03,920
because you drink too much,

473
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,960
or Columbo,
because of your bad clothes.

474
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:06,280
or Columbo,
because of your bad clothes.

475
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:08,040
I always thought Columbo would have
<font color="

476
00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:10,080
Not a super-bad smell
but kind of funky.

477
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:10,600
Not a super-bad smell
but kind of funky.

478
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,640
You know? Like when you cook
a potato in a microwave.

479
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:13,200
You know? Like when you cook
a potato in a microwave.

480
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:14,680
<font color="

481
00:20:17,360 --> 00:20:18,880
Would you like to explain?

482
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:37,800
Your whole investigation is a joke.

483
00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:39,840
I mean,
why haven't forensics been here yet?

484
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:40,160
I mean,
why haven't forensics been here yet?

485
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:42,200
We're over-stretched.
We don't have the...

486
00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:42,560
We're over-stretched.
We don't have the...

487
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,320
<font color="
to you.

488
00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:46,360
What were you doing in his room?
You've got the wrong bloke.

489
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:46,920
What were you doing in his room?
You've got the wrong bloke.

490
00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:48,840
Did you notice the missing gin
from the mini bar?

491
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:50,880
Yes. Actually, no, but so what?

492
00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:52,000
Yes. Actually, no, but so what?

493
00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:54,040
Well, he had an all-inclusive
wrist band. Why use the mini bar?

494
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:54,800
Well, he had an all-inclusive
wrist band. Why use the mini bar?

495
00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:56,840
And there was a light bulb missing
from the balcony,

496
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:57,160
And there was a light bulb missing
from the balcony,

497
00:20:57,200 --> 00:20:58,920
and the trouser press
wasn't in the wardrobe.

498
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:00,480
So he was using the trouser press.

499
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:02,520
Oh, look alive, Jesus.
Nobody uses a trouser press.

500
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:03,800
Oh, look alive, Jesus.
Nobody uses a trouser press.

501
00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:05,240
This is why he didn't kill Darren?

502
00:21:05,280 --> 00:21:07,040
<font color="
the trouser press?

503
00:21:07,080 --> 00:21:09,080
No, these are what I call anomalies.

504
00:21:09,120 --> 00:21:09,880
No, these are what I call anomalies.

505
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:11,600
Hey! I told you that.

506
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:13,640
Steve didn't kill Darren

507
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:13,920
Steve didn't kill Darren

508
00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:15,840
because by the time
he went to his room last night,

509
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:17,880
Darren was already dead.

510
00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:18,560
Darren was already dead.

511
00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:20,320
Let me introduce you to Big Tone.

512
00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:24,680
A seagull?
<font color="

513
00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:25,320
A seagull?
Yeah, one of them big ones.

514
00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:27,120
What time was this?

515
00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:29,160
Quarter to one. I checked my watch.
Can I see the watch?

516
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:29,800
Quarter to one. I checked my watch.
Can I see the watch?

517
00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:31,840
Shell.
<font color="

518
00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:32,520
Shell.
Oh.

519
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:33,880
He don't like a tan line.

520
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:37,600
This is an hour slow.

521
00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:40,760
Oh, you dozy twonk.

522
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:42,800
You forgot to wind it forward
when we landed.

523
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:43,360
You forgot to wind it forward
when we landed.

524
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:45,400
<font color="
of the body hitting the water

525
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:47,440
This means that the sound
of the body hitting the water

526
00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:47,760
This means that the sound
of the body hitting the water

527
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:49,800
coincides exactly with when
we know Steve was in Darren's room.

528
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,840
<font color="
we know Steve was in Darren's room.

529
00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:52,720
coincides exactly with when
we know Steve was in Darren's room.

530
00:21:56,720 --> 00:21:58,720
And being a detective
was your actual job, yes?

531
00:21:58,760 --> 00:21:59,120
And being a detective
was your actual job, yes?

532
00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:04,920
HE EXHALES DEEPLY
Why did I ever listen to you?

533
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:05,560
HE EXHALES DEEPLY
Why did I ever listen to you?

534
00:22:08,120 --> 00:22:10,120
You've wasted everyone's time.
Leave it, Michelle.

535
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:10,960
You've wasted everyone's time.
Leave it, Michelle.

536
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:30,400
DISTANT RADIO PLAYS

537
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:30,720
DISTANT RADIO PLAYS

538
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,040
I thought
you were re-stocking the crisps.

539
00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:34,480
I thought
you were re-stocking the crisps.

540
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:36,520
Crisps can wait. Look at this.

541
00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:36,800
<font color="

542
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:38,840
Half an hour before
Darren comes back to his room,

543
00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:39,680
Half an hour before
Darren comes back to his room,

544
00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:41,720
this guy walks into the room
next door, 514.

545
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:42,400
this guy walks into the room
next door, 514.

546
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:44,440
<font color="

547
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:46,480
Then at 1:46, here comes Steve.

548
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:46,680
Then at 1:46, here comes Steve.

549
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:48,800
He goes in.

550
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:50,840
One minute later,
he comes out again.

551
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:51,640
One minute later,
he comes out again.

552
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:53,680
Fast forward ten minutes,

553
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:54,040
<font color="

554
00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:56,080
Sombrero guy comes back out
of room 514.

555
00:22:56,120 --> 00:22:56,960
Sombrero guy comes back out
of room 514.

556
00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,000
I checked with the hotel,
and that room was empty.

557
00:22:59,040 --> 00:22:59,880
I checked with the hotel,
and that room was empty.

558
00:22:59,920 --> 00:23:01,400
<font color="

559
00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:03,440
And now looks like
his arm is missing.

560
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:04,040
And now looks like
his arm is missing.

561
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:05,920
Perhaps he was mauled by a bear.

562
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:11,080
Is that a roast?
Where'd you get a roast?

563
00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:11,520
Is that a roast?
Where'd you get a roast?

564
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:13,760
I had it delivered.

565
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:15,360
HE SIGHS DEEPLY

566
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:18,320
Rosa, take your medicine.

567
00:23:18,360 --> 00:23:20,360
The guy's guilty,
and if he's not guilty,

568
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:20,680
The guy's guilty,
and if he's not guilty,

569
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:22,600
he's gonna need more
than a knackered old copper

570
00:23:22,640 --> 00:23:24,000
and a failed actress
to help him out.

571
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:28,560
You think I'm a failed actress?

572
00:23:32,680 --> 00:23:34,040
You know what my father said to me

573
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,520
when I told him
I wanted to be an actor?

574
00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:39,840
He said, "I would rather you told me
<font color="

575
00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:40,920
He said, "I would rather you told me
you were a bank robber.

576
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:44,400
"At least then
maybe you'd earn some money."

577
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:45,200
"At least then
maybe you'd earn some money."

578
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:47,240
HE SIGHS
Jeez.

579
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,000
HE SIGHS
Jeez.

580
00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:49,960
I'm... I'm sorry. I...

581
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:52,000
HE STUTTERS
I didn't mean... you know...

582
00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:53,680
HE STUTTERS
I didn't mean... you know...

583
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:57,760
Ha! Failed actress? I had you.

584
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:58,640
Ha! Failed actress? I had you.

585
00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:00,040
No, you didn't.

586
00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:02,080
Yes, I did,
because I am a brilliant actress.

587
00:24:02,120 --> 00:24:02,800
Yes, I did,
because I am a brilliant actress.

588
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,840
But more importantly,
I am a good person.

589
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:06,000
<font color="
I am a good person.

590
00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:08,040
And bad things happen
when good people do nothing.

591
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:08,600
And bad things happen
when good people do nothing.

592
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,640
Nothing's all you've done
since you've worked here.

593
00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:10,920
Nothing's all you've done
since you've worked here.

594
00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:11,960
Do them crisps.

595
00:24:13,120 --> 00:24:14,680
Why did you come
<font color="

596
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,720
To sit in your boring pub
and do nothing until you die?

597
00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:17,160
To sit in your boring pub
and do nothing until you die?

598
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:20,400
Give or take.
But you can solve this case.

599
00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:21,440
Give or take.
But you can solve this case.

600
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,480
No, I can't. My brain's gone.

601
00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:24,160
No, I can't. My brain's gone.

602
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:26,200
I mean, imagine not even checking
the watch. Schoolboy error.

603
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:27,200
I mean, imagine not even checking
the watch. Schoolboy error.

604
00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,240
Do the crisps.

605
00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:29,480
Do the crisps.

606
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:31,520
Do it yourself. I quit.

607
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:31,960
Do it yourself. I quit.

608
00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:35,000
HE SIGHS

609
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:45,680
Seriously, what's wrong
with my toasties?

610
00:24:45,720 --> 00:24:46,080
Seriously, what's wrong
with my toasties?

611
00:24:46,120 --> 00:24:48,120
Hm-hm-hm. Mmm!

612
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:49,040
Hm-hm-hm. Mmm!

613
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:53,800
SIGHS

614
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:10,640
<font color="

615
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:13,680
Hi, Jackie.

616
00:25:19,120 --> 00:25:20,080
You want a funny hat?

617
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:23,520
I'm OK, thanks.
You're sad.

618
00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:24,000
I'm OK, thanks.
You're sad.

619
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,160
Did you do badly
in an audition again?

620
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:29,200
No, I'm just feeling
<font color="

621
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:30,800
No, I'm just feeling
a bit out of my depth.

622
00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:32,480
I understand.

623
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:34,520
I saw your showreel, Rosa.
It's not very good, eh?

624
00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:34,760
I saw your showreel, Rosa.
It's not very good, eh?

625
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:37,080
Can you help me?

626
00:25:42,120 --> 00:25:44,000
<font color="

627
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,040
I know this person
who got arrested for murder.

628
00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:46,840
I know this person
who got arrested for murder.

629
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,880
Ah, the Gary Barlow man.
You know about that?

630
00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:49,840
Ah, the Gary Barlow man.
You know about that?

631
00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:51,200
<font color="

632
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,240
He pushed Robbie Williams
from the fifth floor.

633
00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:53,520
He pushed Robbie Williams
from the fifth floor.

634
00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:54,800
But I know he didn't.

635
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:56,840
The police aren't even looking
at the other bandmates.

636
00:25:56,880 --> 00:25:57,120
The police aren't even looking
<font color="

637
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:58,560
One was jealous of his new job,

638
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,600
then there's this weird
love triangle with Isabella.

639
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:00,920
then there's this weird
love triangle with Isabella.

640
00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:02,840
No, not a triangle.

641
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:04,880
She only loved one of them.
<font color="

642
00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:06,920
She only loved one of them.
Who? Who was Isabella in love with?

643
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:07,200
She only loved one of them.
Who? Who was Isabella in love with?

644
00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:09,240
I'm afraid that is gonna cost you.

645
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:09,800
I'm afraid that is gonna cost you.

646
00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:11,240
<font color="

647
00:26:12,360 --> 00:26:13,800
No.

648
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:37,920
Hello.
No, thank you.

649
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:38,240
Hello.
No, thank you.

650
00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:40,280
PHONE RINGING

651
00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:40,760
PHONE RINGING

652
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:41,960
SIGHS

653
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:45,920
Isabella and Darren
were totally in love.

654
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:46,600
Isabella and Darren
were totally in love.

655
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:48,640
{\an8}So she chucked him off the balcony
because he was leaving?

656
00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:49,600
{\an8}So she chucked him off the balcony
because he was leaving?

657
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:51,560
{\an8}No, no, no, that's the thing.
He was not leaving.

658
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,600
{\an8}Well, he was leaving,
but he was not leaving her.

659
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:55,640
{\an8}She was going with him to Greece.
'Interesting.'

660
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:56,760
{\an8}She was going with him to Greece.
'Interesting.'

661
00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:58,240
{\an8}Well, all the best with that.

662
00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:00,280
{\an8}No, stop pretending you don't care.
I'm coming to the pub.

663
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:01,160
{\an8}No, stop pretending you don't care.
I'm coming to the pub.

664
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:02,920
{\an8}'I'm not at the pub.'

665
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:04,960
The pub's closed tonight.
'Where are you?'

666
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:06,160
The pub's closed tonight.
'Where are you?'

667
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:07,680
SIGHS
None of your business.

668
00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:09,720
<font color="

669
00:27:09,760 --> 00:27:10,880
OK. Weird. I'll see you tomorrow.

670
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:12,480
I thought you quit?

671
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:14,520
OK, fine. Goodbye forever.

672
00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:14,760
OK, fine. Goodbye forever.

673
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:18,360
SIGHS

674
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:27,080
Shall we just pretend
we didn't see each other?

675
00:27:27,120 --> 00:27:27,400
Shall we just pretend
we didn't see each other?

676
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,440
I was here on police business.
Oh, really... Maria?

677
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:31,480
<font color="
Oh, really... Maria?

678
00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:31,720
I was here on police business.
Oh, really... Maria?

679
00:27:33,640 --> 00:27:35,120
Look, I'm not judging.

680
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:37,160
I'm just surprised you qualified
for an over-50s thing.

681
00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:37,720
I'm just surprised you qualified
for an over-50s thing.

682
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:39,760
I had to persuade them to let me in.

683
00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:39,960
I had to persuade them to let me in.

684
00:27:41,120 --> 00:27:42,720
You'll be fine.

685
00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:45,520
How was it?

686
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:47,560
<font color="
of my life.

687
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:48,400
One of the worst ten minutes
of my life.

688
00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:49,480
Enjoy.

689
00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:56,960
I don't suppose
you fancy going for a drink?

690
00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:57,360
I don't suppose
you fancy going for a drink?

691
00:28:01,800 --> 00:28:03,800
I was working 12-, 14-hour days.

692
00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:05,320
I was working 12-, 14-hour days.

693
00:28:05,360 --> 00:28:07,360
Tiff ended up having an affair.
Tiff?

694
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:07,920
Tiff ended up having an affair.
Tiff?

695
00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:09,960
Tiffany.
Your wife was called Tiffany?

696
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:10,560
Tiffany.
Your wife was called Tiffany?

697
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:12,600
No, Tiffany was the cat.
We just drifted.

698
00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:13,160
No, Tiffany was the cat.
We just drifted.

699
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:14,760
Yes, my wife was called Tiffany.

700
00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:16,800
I can't picture you
with a woman called Tiffany.

701
00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:17,640
I can't picture you
<font color="

702
00:28:19,360 --> 00:28:21,360
When I think of a Tiffany,
I think of someone,

703
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:22,960
When I think of a Tiffany,
I think of someone,

704
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:25,000
I... I don't know, attractive.

705
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:26,320
I... I don't know, attractive.

706
00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:28,880
She was.

707
00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:31,280
That was the problem.

708
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,200
That what happened to you?
Pressures of the job?

709
00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:37,920
That what happened to you?
Pressures of the job?

710
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:39,400
I don't wanna talk to you
about this.

711
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:41,560
Divorce?

712
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,600
Personal things. Feelings.

713
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:44,600
Personal things. Feelings.

714
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:47,840
Mm. You surprise me.

715
00:28:47,880 --> 00:28:48,120
Mm. You surprise me.

716
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:50,160
That I don't wanna open up to a man
I barely know and don't respect?

717
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:51,960
<font color="
I barely know and don't respect?

718
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,000
No, that you have feelings.

719
00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:54,440
No, that you have feelings.

720
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:58,800
I'm not bad at my job.

721
00:28:58,840 --> 00:28:59,080
I'm not bad at my job.

722
00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:00,720
What did I say?
I didn't say anything.

723
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:02,760
You said I was a complete waste
of taxpayers' money.

724
00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:03,600
<font color="
of taxpayers' money.

725
00:29:03,640 --> 00:29:04,960
Well, apart from that.

726
00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,280
I am a good detective, OK?
The whole force has been cut back.

727
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:08,840
I am a good detective, OK?
The whole force has been cut back.

728
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,040
Well, you've always got Jesus.
Jesus?

729
00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:13,480
Well, you've always got Jesus.
<font color="

730
00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:17,080
Yesterday,
he accidentally called me "Mum".

731
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:17,360
Yesterday,
he accidentally called me "Mum".

732
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:19,320
HE CHUCKLES

733
00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:25,200
Do you want another drink?
Hm.

734
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:25,520
Do you want another drink?
Hm.

735
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:27,560
I've got work tomorrow.
So do I.

736
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:28,520
<font color="
So do I.

737
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:30,560
If you call "sitting around
drinking beer" work.

738
00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:31,400
If you call "sitting around
drinking beer" work.

739
00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:33,440
Well, that's not fair.
I often have to stand up.

740
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:34,480
Well, that's not fair.
I often have to stand up.

741
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:36,840
Good night.

742
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:25,080
Why are you still here?

743
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:29,880
<font color="

744
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:33,360
No, I didn't know.

745
00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:38,160
OK.

746
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:42,480
Yes, well tell him...
tell him to call me. Yeah.

747
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:43,240
Yes, well tell him...
tell him to call me. Yeah.

748
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:46,960
This morning. Bye bye.

749
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:47,680
This morning. Bye bye.

750
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:54,280
<font color="
I was just getting my shoes.

751
00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:55,080
Seriously, why are you still here?
I was just getting my shoes.

752
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:58,680
So, you've got
the postmortem results back, then.

753
00:30:58,720 --> 00:30:59,240
So, you've got
the postmortem results back, then.

754
00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:00,400
How do you know that?

755
00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:02,440
Two injuries,
one on either side of his head?

756
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:02,680
Two injuries,
one on either side of his head?

757
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:05,880
That didn't happen on the fall.

758
00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:10,120
Must have been attacked in his room.
SHE SIGHS

759
00:31:10,160 --> 00:31:12,120
I'm so glad you're here
to explain this to me (!)

760
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:14,160
But that doesn't make sense,
cos why would you kill someone

761
00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:15,360
But that doesn't make sense,
cos why would you kill someone

762
00:31:15,400 --> 00:31:17,400
and then throw their body
over the balcony?

763
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:17,640
and then throw their body
over the balcony?

764
00:31:19,360 --> 00:31:21,360
Either way, you're now looking
for a murder weapon.

765
00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:21,880
Either way, you're now looking
for a murder weapon.

766
00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:25,240
But Steve was empty-handed
when he left the room.

767
00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:29,560
I saw the tape.
How have you seen the tape?

768
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:30,000
I saw the tape.
How have you seen the tape?

769
00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:33,520
You need to stop interfering
with this investigation right now,

770
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:34,880
You need to stop interfering
with this investigation right now,

771
00:31:34,920 --> 00:31:36,920
<font color="
the course of justice.

772
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:37,680
or I will arrest you for perverting
the course of justice.

773
00:31:38,960 --> 00:31:40,960
There's only one pervert in here,
things you got up to last night.

774
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:41,800
There's only one pervert in here,
things you got up to last night.

775
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:43,840
That was a mistake.
Nah, come on. It was fun.

776
00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:44,120
<font color="
Nah, come on. It was fun.

777
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:45,360
No, I mean the whole thing.

778
00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:48,760
I don't know how it happened.
Please just leave.

779
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:50,000
I don't know how it happened.
Please just leave.

780
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:52,640
Fair enough.

781
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:54,680
But if I were you, I'd have
another look at that crime scene.

782
00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:55,000
But if I were you, I'd have
another look at that crime scene.

783
00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:56,480
The murder weapon has to be
in there.

784
00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:58,240
I don't need advice
from detectives like you.

785
00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:01,640
I googled you last night
while you were snoring in my bed.

786
00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:02,040
I googled you last night
while you were snoring in my bed.

787
00:32:02,080 --> 00:32:03,680
Sorry about that.

788
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:05,600
You didn't retire.

789
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,440
You were fired
<font color="

790
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:08,760
SIGHS SOFTLY

791
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:12,160
I was set up.
Of course.

792
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:13,080
I was set up.
Of course.

793
00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:15,120
{\an8}I was set up by my boss.

794
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:16,040
{\an8}I was set up by my boss.

795
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:18,040
{\an8}That's who Tiff was having
the affair with.

796
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:20,080
I was a good copper.
Well, now you're a barman.

797
00:32:20,120 --> 00:32:20,760
I was a good copper.
Well, now you're a barman.

798
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,200
<font color="
and leave the police work to me.

799
00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:24,600
So go back to your miserable pub
and leave the police work to me.

800
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:27,360
HE SIGHS

801
00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:36,560
DOOR OPENS

802
00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:38,880
DOOR CLOSES

803
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:45,960
You gonna eat that sausage?
Yes.

804
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:46,200
You gonna eat that sausage?
Yes.

805
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,480
<font color="

806
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:50,720
What about those beans?

807
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:52,760
Bella, you've not touched the beans.

808
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:52,960
Bella, you've not touched the beans.

809
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:04,560
Does "quit" mean something different
in Spanish?

810
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:04,880
Does "quit" mean something different
in Spanish?

811
00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:06,720
My father says
if I don't have a job,

812
00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:08,080
<font color="

813
00:33:09,960 --> 00:33:11,960
I thought you wanted nothing to do
with the case.

814
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:12,280
I thought you wanted nothing to do
with the case.

815
00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:14,320
I don't.
Just keeps coming back, like you.

816
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:15,120
I don't.
Just keeps coming back, like you.

817
00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:18,640
Is it maybe a little to do
with Inspector Maria?

818
00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:19,240
<font color="
with Inspector Maria?

819
00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:21,280
I feel like there's something
you're not telling me.

820
00:33:21,320 --> 00:33:21,920
I feel like there's something
you're not telling me.

821
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:25,240
Mm. There's really not.

822
00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:25,440
Mm. There's really not.

823
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:29,080
Darren was hit on the head twice
before he went over the balcony.

824
00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:30,440
Darren was hit on the head twice
before he went over the balcony.

825
00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:31,520
How do you know this?

826
00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:33,560
The Spanish cops think that the CCTV
of Steve coming to Darren's room

827
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:35,600
The Spanish cops think that the CCTV
of Steve coming to Darren's room

828
00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:35,880
The Spanish cops think that the CCTV
of Steve coming to Darren's room

829
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:36,960
is what incriminates him,

830
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:39,000
but I think
it's what proves he didn't do it.

831
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:39,320
but I think
it's what proves he didn't do it.

832
00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:41,360
He's empty-handed when he leaves,
and there's nothing in the room

833
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:42,720
He's empty-handed when he leaves,
and there's nothing in the room

834
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:44,760
that you could use
as a murder weapon.

835
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:45,080
that you could use
as a murder weapon.

836
00:33:45,120 --> 00:33:47,120
I went back in and had a look
at the crime scene this morning.

837
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:47,480
I went back in and had a look
at the crime scene this morning.

838
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:48,520
Without me?

839
00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:53,040
There was a smell of gin
on the balcony.

840
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:53,320
There was a smell of gin
on the balcony.

841
00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:54,800
The mini bar.

842
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:56,840
<font color="
with the missing gin bottle.

843
00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:57,080
Darren was killed
with the missing gin bottle.

844
00:33:58,000 --> 00:33:59,520
What? No!

845
00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:01,560
How's a miniature gin bottle
gonna be heavy enough

846
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:01,840
How's a miniature gin bottle
gonna be heavy enough

847
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:03,120
to do that kind of damage?

848
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:05,160
What kind of damage?
Where are you getting this from?

849
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:06,000
<font color="
Where are you getting this from?

850
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:08,040
Whoever killed Darren
is under that sombrero.

851
00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:09,640
Whoever killed Darren
is under that sombrero.

852
00:34:09,680 --> 00:34:11,680
Which is literally
what I said yesterday.

853
00:34:11,720 --> 00:34:11,920
Which is literally
what I said yesterday.

854
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:15,520
Yeah, but now I know who it is.

855
00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:16,440
Yeah, but now I know who it is.

856
00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:18,280
Look what happens
after he leaves the room.

857
00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:28,120
What killer cares
about a wonky picture?

858
00:34:28,160 --> 00:34:30,160
One that likes everything to be
perfect, perfect, perfect.

859
00:34:30,200 --> 00:34:32,200
One that likes everything to be
perfect, perfect, perfect.

860
00:34:32,240 --> 00:34:32,440
One that likes everything to be
perfect, perfect, perfect.

861
00:34:46,840 --> 00:34:48,440
I have called the police.

862
00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:50,480
<font color="

863
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:51,120
The real police.

864
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:53,160
Well, I guess one of us
are getting arrested, then.

865
00:34:53,200 --> 00:34:53,960
Well, I guess one of us
are getting arrested, then.

866
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:55,600
Isabella,
when did you tell your father

867
00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:57,080
you were leaving for good
with Darren?

868
00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:01,120
The night before
<font color="

869
00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:01,640
The night before
we were meant to leave.

870
00:35:01,680 --> 00:35:03,680
Papa.
What?

871
00:35:03,720 --> 00:35:03,960
Papa.
What?

872
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:05,680
IN SPANISH:

873
00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:10,000


874
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:10,400


875
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,600
I was too afraid to tell him sooner.

876
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:13,920
<font color="

877
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:18,960
You come into my hotel,
and you say such disgusting things?

878
00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:20,640
You come into my hotel,
and you say such disgusting things?

879
00:35:20,680 --> 00:35:22,480
How did I kill Darren?

880
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:24,520
Gotta be honest,
I'm not a hundred percent.

881
00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:25,200
Gotta be honest,
I'm not a hundred percent.

882
00:35:25,240 --> 00:35:26,800
Well, good luck.

883
00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:28,840
<font color="
the police arrive to figure it out.

884
00:35:28,880 --> 00:35:29,520
You have two minutes until
the police arrive to figure it out.

885
00:35:29,560 --> 00:35:30,800
Isabella, come now.

886
00:35:32,040 --> 00:35:33,280
Let's go.

887
00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:37,600
You should probably go.

888
00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:39,640
Your father's not gonna be
best pleased if you get arrested.

889
00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:40,560
Your father's not gonna be
best pleased if you get arrested.

890
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:42,600
<font color="
HE SIGHS DEEPLY

891
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:42,880
I think that's why I want to stay.
HE SIGHS DEEPLY

892
00:35:44,160 --> 00:35:46,160
You know what they call this?
This is the brick wall.

893
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:46,840
You know what they call this?
This is the brick wall.

894
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:48,880
The cops are sure
they have their man,

895
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:49,200
<font color="
they have their man,

896
00:35:49,240 --> 00:35:50,760
but the crime seems impossible
to solve

897
00:35:50,800 --> 00:35:52,760
and it looks like
he's going to get away with it.

898
00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:54,640
But it's OK
because you know what comes next?

899
00:35:54,680 --> 00:35:56,680
The eureka moment.

900
00:35:56,720 --> 00:35:56,960
<font color="

901
00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:59,000
In Miss Marple,
series one, episode five,

902
00:35:59,040 --> 00:35:59,600
In Miss Marple,
series one, episode five,

903
00:35:59,640 --> 00:36:01,640
Colonel Lucius Protheroe
is found dead in the vicarage.

904
00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:02,440
Colonel Lucius Protheroe
is found dead in the vicarage.

905
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:05,840
<font color="
was fake.

906
00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:07,040
And it turns out the second gunshot
was fake.

907
00:36:08,240 --> 00:36:10,240
What is it? What are you staring at?

908
00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:10,760
What is it? What are you staring at?

909
00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:18,360
It's happening?
You're having the eureka moment?

910
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:18,840
<font color="
You're having the eureka moment?

911
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:20,480
Not with you banging on, I'm not.

912
00:36:21,800 --> 00:36:23,320
I warned you.

913
00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:25,360
I told you what would happen.
You going down.

914
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:26,080
I told you what would happen.
You going down.

915
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,120
Shut up, Jesus.
<font color="

916
00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:29,280
Shut up, Jesus.
Dennis is about to solve the case.

917
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:31,320
Right?
Mm, I'd say I'm 50-50.

918
00:36:31,360 --> 00:36:32,080
Right?
Mm, I'd say I'm 50-50.

919
00:36:32,120 --> 00:36:34,120
Jesus...
Wait, wait, wait!

920
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:34,760
Jesus...
Wait, wait, wait!

921
00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:36,440
Look...

922
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:38,480
Carlos called Isabella his rock.

923
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:39,880
Carlos called Isabella his rock.

924
00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:41,920
<font color="
you know?

925
00:36:41,960 --> 00:36:42,880
She's like my Puig Campana,
you know?

926
00:36:42,920 --> 00:36:44,920
The mountain that looks
over Benidorm.

927
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:45,160
The mountain that looks
over Benidorm.

928
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:48,000
She's my rock.

929
00:36:48,040 --> 00:36:50,040
He couldn't let her go, especially
not with a bloke like Darren.

930
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:50,760
He couldn't let her go, especially
not with a bloke like Darren.

931
00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:52,800
Lucky for him, he finds Steve
and Darren arguing earlier,

932
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:54,360
Lucky for him, he finds Steve
and Darren arguing earlier,

933
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,400
which presents him
with both a suspect and a weapon.

934
00:36:56,440 --> 00:36:57,520
which presents him
with both a suspect and a weapon.

935
00:36:57,560 --> 00:36:59,560
You touch that award,
and I'll kill you!

936
00:36:59,600 --> 00:36:59,840
You touch that award,
<font color="

937
00:36:59,880 --> 00:37:01,440
This is pure speculation.

938
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:03,480
You think this is flimsy?
I'm just getting started.

939
00:37:03,520 --> 00:37:03,760
You think this is flimsy?
I'm just getting started.

940
00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:04,680
Keep going.

941
00:37:05,840 --> 00:37:07,360
Carlos goes up to fifth floor.

942
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:09,400
He can't switch the CCTV off
because it would look suspicious,

943
00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:10,720
He can't switch the CCTV off
because it would look suspicious,

944
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:12,760
but earlier, he finds a disguise.

945
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:14,800
but earlier, he finds a disguise.

946
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:15,000
but earlier, he finds a disguise.

947
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:20,960
That's who was on the CCTV.

948
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:24,920
This man goes
into the room next door.

949
00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:26,960
It's a misdirect. Right?

950
00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:27,600
It's a misdirect. Right?

951
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:31,520
So how does he get between rooms?
I'll show you.

952
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:31,960
So how does he get between rooms?
I'll show you.

953
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:35,080
<font color="
I think this is the denouement.

954
00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:36,400
What is happening?
I think this is the denouement.

955
00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:39,440
Look at the skirting here.

956
00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:42,680
The whole room is made out of evenly
cut pieces, apart from this bit.

957
00:37:42,720 --> 00:37:44,720
The whole room is made out of evenly
cut pieces, apart from this bit.

958
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:45,000
The whole room is made out of evenly
cut pieces, apart from this bit.

959
00:37:45,040 --> 00:37:46,200
Why cut it like that?

960
00:37:46,240 --> 00:37:48,240
<font color="
everyone's time and tell us?

961
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:48,720
Why don't you just save
everyone's time and tell us?

962
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:50,320
Cos the hotel's
just been refurbished,

963
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:52,360
and the wardrobe used to be here.

964
00:37:52,400 --> 00:37:53,360
and the wardrobe used to be here.

965
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:55,240
OK. Where are you going with this?

966
00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:57,280
Next door. Give me your master key.

967
00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:57,480
Next door. Give me your master key.

968
00:37:59,080 --> 00:38:00,400
Right.

969
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:02,440
I was thinking about the magician,

970
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:03,080
I was thinking about the magician,

971
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:05,120
the Amazing Keith
and His Secret Door.

972
00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:05,680
the Amazing Keith
and His Secret Door.

973
00:38:05,720 --> 00:38:06,800
DOOR CLOSES

974
00:38:06,840 --> 00:38:08,840
There's always some compartment
or a panel or something.

975
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:10,760
There's always some compartment
or a panel or something.

976
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:11,920
NEIGHBOURING DOOR
OPENS

977
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:13,960
And after the hotel was refurbished,
it was adults only.

978
00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:15,360
And after the hotel was refurbished,
it was adults only.

979
00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:17,400
There's no families staying.

980
00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:17,680
There's no families staying.

981
00:38:17,720 --> 00:38:19,200
No families
means you don't need any...

982
00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:22,640
Ta-da!

983
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:25,960
EXHALES DEEPLY
..interconnecting rooms.

984
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:28,000
That's good. That's really good.

985
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:28,280
That's good. That's really good.

986
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:29,760
They don't even bother
to brick it up.

987
00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:31,800
They just move the wardrobe
from here and put it in front of it.

988
00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:33,480
They just move the wardrobe
from here and put it in front of it.

989
00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:35,520
But this would mean Carlos
<font color="

990
00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:37,200
But this would mean Carlos
was in the room when Steve came in.

991
00:38:37,240 --> 00:38:38,320
Almost.

992
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:40,360
Almost? This is total bullshit.

993
00:38:40,400 --> 00:38:41,680
Almost? This is total bullshit.

994
00:38:41,720 --> 00:38:43,720
{\an8}You let yourself
into room 514 next door,

995
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:44,400
{\an8}You let yourself
into room 514 next door,

996
00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:46,440
{\an8}took off your poncho
and got into the wardrobe,

997
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:46,760
{\an8}took off your poncho
and got into the wardrobe,

998
00:38:46,800 --> 00:38:48,520
{\an8}where you then popped out
the wee plugs

999
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:49,960
{\an8}that hold the back panel in place,

1000
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:51,840
{\an8}taking you through
into Darren's room.

1001
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:53,880
You think he just jumped him
and killed him?

1002
00:38:53,920 --> 00:38:54,320
You think he just jumped him
and killed him?

1003
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:56,360
Darren was a big, muscly guy,
<font color="

1004
00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:57,840
Darren was a big, muscly guy,
and Carlos is kind of puny.

1005
00:38:59,920 --> 00:39:01,600
Good point well made, Jesus.

1006
00:39:01,640 --> 00:39:03,640
There was no light bulb
on the balcony

1007
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:03,920
There was no light bulb
on the balcony

1008
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:05,520
because Carlos took it out.

1009
00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:08,240
When Darren got back,
he went outside

1010
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,200
and was distracted by the light...

1011
00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:17,360
..allowing him to use
the element of surprise.

1012
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:18,200
..allowing him to use
the element of surprise.

1013
00:39:18,240 --> 00:39:20,200
You hit him once to knock him out...

1014
00:39:20,240 --> 00:39:21,480
THUD,
DARREN GROANS

1015
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,520
..and a second time to kill him.
THUD

1016
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:24,240
..and a second time to kill him.
THUD

1017
00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:26,280
Anyone could have been on their
balcony and been none the wiser.

1018
00:39:26,320 --> 00:39:27,560
Anyone could have been on their
balcony and been none the wiser.

1019
00:39:27,600 --> 00:39:29,600
The whole thing was done
in near silence.

1020
00:39:29,640 --> 00:39:30,120
The whole thing was done
in near silence.

1021
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,160
Silent but deadly.

1022
00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:32,440
Silent but deadly.

1023
00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:34,480
Course you didn't bank on Steve
arriving at exactly that moment.

1024
00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:35,800
Course you didn't bank on Steve
arriving at exactly that moment.

1025
00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:38,080
Darren, it's me. Open up.

1026
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:40,120
Darren, I want that award back.
I'm not leaving without it.

1027
00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:42,160
Darren, I want that award back.
I'm not leaving without it.

1028
00:39:42,200 --> 00:39:42,480
Darren, I want that award back.
<font color="

1029
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:44,520
'You were about to be found
next to a dead body.'

1030
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:44,840
'You were about to be found
next to a dead body.'

1031
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:49,400
You know I've got a key, dickhead.

1032
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:49,680
You know I've got a key, dickhead.

1033
00:39:49,720 --> 00:39:51,320
You did the only thing
you could think of.

1034
00:39:51,360 --> 00:39:53,240
You threw Darren's body
over the balcony.

1035
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:54,400
WATER SPLASHING

1036
00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:56,440
What was that splash?
<font color="

1037
00:39:56,480 --> 00:39:56,800
What was that splash?
It was probably a seagull.

1038
00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:58,840
So when Steve comes out,
he looks around,

1039
00:39:58,880 --> 00:39:59,400
So when Steve comes out,
he looks around,

1040
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:01,440
sees nothing and leaves.

1041
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:02,040
sees nothing and leaves.

1042
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,080
You clean your finger prints
from the murder scene

1043
00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:04,400
You clean your finger prints
from the murder scene

1044
00:40:04,440 --> 00:40:06,440
using the gin from the mini-bar,
go back through the wardrobe...

1045
00:40:06,480 --> 00:40:07,720
using the gin from the mini-bar,
go back through the wardrobe...

1046
00:40:07,760 --> 00:40:09,760
Like Aslan the Lion.

1047
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:11,800
Yeah, like Aslan the Lion.

1048
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:12,000
Yeah, like Aslan the Lion.

1049
00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:16,760
..forgetting to replace
the trouser press.

1050
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:18,240
..forgetting to replace
the trouser press.

1051
00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:20,280
You then put your disguise back on
and left the way you came,

1052
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:21,280
You then put your disguise back on
and left the way you came,

1053
00:40:21,320 --> 00:40:23,320
clutching the award,
the murder weapon,

1054
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:24,680
clutching the award,
the murder weapon,

1055
00:40:24,720 --> 00:40:26,400
under your poncho.

1056
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:30,400
I'm guessing
by the look on your face

1057
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:32,000
I've pretty much nailed that, eh?

1058
00:40:32,040 --> 00:40:33,120
Papa?

1059
00:40:36,680 --> 00:40:38,400
IN SPANISH:

1060
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:45,040
ISABELLA
BREATHES HEAVILY

1061
00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:45,280
ISABELLA
BREATHES HEAVILY

1062
00:41:06,920 --> 00:41:08,920
ISABELLA SNIFFLES,
SOBS

1063
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:09,160
ISABELLA SNIFFLES,
SOBS

1064
00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:20,680
That was by far the luckiest piece
of police work I have ever seen.

1065
00:41:20,720 --> 00:41:22,120
That was by far the luckiest piece
of police work I have ever seen.

1066
00:41:23,520 --> 00:41:25,520
And all done without planting
a single piece of evidence.

1067
00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:26,800
And all done without planting
a single piece of evidence.

1068
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:28,720
I meant what I said.
I was a good detective.

1069
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:30,640
I am a good detective.

1070
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:32,680
So don't ever interfere
in police business again.

1071
00:41:32,720 --> 00:41:33,000
So don't ever interfere
in police business again.

1072
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:34,080
Not gonna.

1073
00:41:35,280 --> 00:41:37,280
<font color="
last night.

1074
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:37,680
Or tell anyone about what happened
last night.

1075
00:41:37,720 --> 00:41:39,720
I won't make that mistake
ever again.

1076
00:41:39,760 --> 00:41:40,160
I won't make that mistake
ever again.

1077
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:41,320
Me neither.

1078
00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:43,360
I mean it. You tell anyone, and...

1079
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:43,960
<font color="

1080
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:46,000
Yeah, yeah, you'll arrest me and
shut down my miserable little pub.

1081
00:41:46,040 --> 00:41:47,600
Yeah, yeah, you'll arrest me and
shut down my miserable little pub.

1082
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:49,640
I was going to say
"depressing little pub".

1083
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:50,200
I was going to say
"depressing little pub".

1084
00:41:50,240 --> 00:41:52,240
Hm, well,
can't be right every time.

1085
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:52,720
Hm, well,
can't be right every time.

1086
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:00,960
<font color="
JESUS CLEARS THROAT

1087
00:42:02,280 --> 00:42:04,280
Maybe after, you and me could go get
a little drink somewhere?

1088
00:42:04,320 --> 00:42:05,120
Maybe after, you and me could go get
a little drink somewhere?

1089
00:42:05,160 --> 00:42:06,880
After what, puberty?

1090
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:09,880
CLEARS THROAT

1091
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:11,920
HE CHUCKLES SOFTLY

1092
00:42:11,960 --> 00:42:12,200
HE CHUCKLES SOFTLY

1093
00:42:12,240 --> 00:42:14,240
That was perfect -
<font color="

1094
00:42:14,280 --> 00:42:14,960
That was perfect -
the anomaly, the brick wall,

1095
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,000
classic eureka moment,
and all solved in under two days.

1096
00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:18,680
classic eureka moment,
and all solved in under two days.

1097
00:42:18,720 --> 00:42:20,440
Yeah. That's never happened before.

1098
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:25,280
You've never had me
<font color="

1099
00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:27,320
We're not partners.
OK, partner.

1100
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:28,200
We're not partners.
OK, partner.

1101
00:42:29,520 --> 00:42:31,520
You're not my partner.
OK, partner.

1102
00:42:31,560 --> 00:42:31,800
You're not my partner.
OK, partner.

1103
00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:33,000
HE SIGHS

1104
00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:36,920
We have a celebrity
in the Laughter Lounge tonight,

1105
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:37,240
We have a celebrity
<font color="

1106
00:42:37,280 --> 00:42:38,880
Vince Starks.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1107
00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:40,000
What you doing here?

1108
00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:42,040
Five sell-out nights
at The Benidorm Palace apparently.

1109
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:42,320
Five sell-out nights
at The Benidorm Palace apparently.

1110
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:43,600
Hey-hey!

1111
00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:45,560
<font color="
on this case,

1112
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:47,000
and I have no detectives.

1113
00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:49,040
We've got a new case?
That is hilarious.

1114
00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:50,480
We've got a new case?
That is hilarious.

1115
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:51,960
So, this guy is a comedian?

1116
00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:53,720
It was meant to be
<font color="

1117
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:55,760
We should speak to Jackie.
JACKIE SIGHS

1118
00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:56,360
We should speak to Jackie.
JACKIE SIGHS

1119
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:58,400
Apparently, you know the word
on the street.What?

1120
00:42:58,440 --> 00:42:58,680
Apparently, you know the word
on the street.What?

1121
00:42:58,720 --> 00:42:59,720
What is it? What's going on?

1122
00:42:59,760 --> 00:43:01,760
I just found the murder weapon.

1123
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:02,000
I just found the murder weapon.

1124
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:03,400
<font color="

1125
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:04,800
There's something else going on.